Part I: Holiday
Road
I found out
long ago
It's a long way down the Holiday Road
Gigs on
holiday weekends can be tricky. Take last year, for example. Diamondbag
scheduled a gig on the Fourth of July at the now-defunct Boar's
Nest, thinking that since the Fourth was on a Thursday, Greenville
would be packed with drunken partiers who didn't have to work the
next day. It seemed like sound logic, until we got to the club and
played for about 14 people-all of them friends of ours. Oops.
So we learned
our lesson, right? No more holiday weekend shows. Well, not exactly.
When my good friend Susan from Chicago told me that she was going
to be in town for the Fourth of July and was dying to see us play
for the first time, I knew I had to schedule a show. Of course,
there was no way we were playing on the Fourth again. I may not
be the brightest bulb in the universe, but I ain't that stupid.
So we reserved the LBG for Saturday the 5th, and I hoped
and prayed that more than 14 people would show up.
I arrived about
7:30 to check on things, and what I saw scared the shit out of me.
There were five people in the bar, all of whom worked there.Uh-oh. The band had been in early to load the gear, so I
headed back home to grab "the shirt." I wasn't going to wear the
usual sparkles at the show-unfortunately, I had been in a walking
boot for nearly two weeks after severely spraining my ankle playing
softball. Hey, at least I didn't break my nose this time! I was
planning on just wearing shorts and a T-shirt due to the big boot,
but that plan went out the window in a hurry when adorable LBG waitress
Chelsey insisted that I simply HAD to wear the threads. I never
like to disappoint the beautiful girls, so of course I went straight
back home and grabbed the sequins. Jon seems to think "the shirt"
has some magical mystical powers, and he may in fact be right. I
guess it's like our version of the Ruby Slippers or something, except
that instead of the Wicked Witch of the West trying to steal them
from me, it's three guys from Oak Lawn who frequent Zippers on Fitzhugh.
When I arrived
back at LBG, I was pleased to see that the place was filling up
rather nicely. In fact, there were already more than 14 people there,
and we weren't even scheduled to play for another hour. Thankfully,
our holiday nightmare from the year before was not going to happen
again. Maybe the shirt truly does have magical powers.
Part II: Thrown
Down
Thrown
down . . . like a barricade
Maybe now he could prove to her
That he could be good for her
And they should be together
The
holiday weekend got off to a really tough start for me. Let's just
say that Thursday the 3rd was a day filled with the highest
of highs and the lowest of lows. I lost something that day that
I care about very deeply, but it's not really something I am willing
to discuss here. I know I'm usually open and honest and will talk
about just anything on this site, but some things are just meant
to be kept private.
However,
I will tell you about the amazing experience that I had on Thursday
night. For only the second time, I got to see Fleetwood Mac live-and
it was from the fourth row. That's right, I was a grand total of
maybe 13 feet away from Stevie Nicks. I'm sure that doesn't impress
many of you, especially given the fact that I couldn't even give
away the extra ticket I had. But let me assure you that the Mac
put on one of the best concerts I have ever seen.
I
started listening to Fleetwood Mac in 1976. My Dad played me "World
Turning" in his 240ZX, and I was hooked. I even remember riding
my bike down to the Wherehouse on Ventura Blvd. to buy Rumours
the day it came out (obviously my freakish love of music was
present even at the tender age of ten). When Fleetwood Mac opened
Reunion Arena on the Tusk tour in 1980, I BEGGED my mother
to take me-no dice. And when they returned in 1982 on the Mirage
tour, once again I was out of luck as I was only fifteen with no
car, no license, and no friends who dug the Mac. When Lindsey Buckingham
left the band before the start of the Tango In the Night
tour, I thought I was screwed forever. But just to prove that miracles
do happen, the band reunited in 1997 for The Dance and I
finally got to see them live. It was a great show.but it didn't
touch the show I saw Thursday night at the AAC.
We
really did have fourth-row seats, thanks to my mastery of the intricacies
of Ticketmaster's on-line ticketing system. We were so close that
I could actually hear Stevie's tambourine from the stage. It was
two and a half hours of heaven for me, and it helped me get through
one of the toughest days of my life. I already can't wait to see
them again, and that's a good thing because I have tickets to see
them this Friday in LA. I'm taking my Dad for his 62nd
birthday, and it will be his first Fleetwood Mac show since the
Rumours tour in 1977-and he's going to be really happy when
they come out and play "World Turning" during the encore. Everything
comes full circle sometimes, my friends.
Part
III: Oh Well
I
can't help about the shape I'm in
I can't sing, I aint pretty, and my legs are thin
With
my foot in the walking boot, I knew my usual stage antics were going
to have to be curtailed for the evening. Thank God Chelsey had convinced
me to wear the shirt, or else the band might have had to rely solely
on our <gasp> musical ability to carry the show-and we all
know that's a recipe for disaster.:) By the time the band went on, there was a pretty large crowd at LBG,
inluding a great many friends who have either never seen us or maybe
only been once or twice. So special thanks go out to Susan, the
Meisers, the Sharers, Claire, and all of the rest of you who spent
some of your holiday weekend with us. You all saw a typical Diamondbag
LBG show, which of course means that even the band had no idea what
was going to transpire.
After
a few warm-up tunes from Jon and No Commitment, we started the first
Diamondbag set of the evening with a first-time set opener: "Girl
You'll Be a Woman Soon." My walking boot really limited my movement
on stage, but before long I was doing my usual moshing anyways.
By the time the first set came to a close, my foot was aching, my
voice was trashed, and I wasn't nearly drunk enough. Thankfully,
the next set belonged to No Commitment, so I had plenty of time
to drink Tuaca and catch up with all of my old friends in attendance.So while Jon & Steph & Matt & Eric & Jay
& Mike entertained the masses, I hung out with my pals and took
requests from the many Neil fans in attendance. Someone asked for
"Shilo"-hey, we know that one! Someone asked for "Hello Again"-almost,
but not quite. Read on for more details about that. Someone even
had the brilliant idea to ask for "America," seeing as it was the
4th of July weekend and all. Yep, playing that one hadn't
even occurred to me.
Part
IV: Johnny Stew
It takes a
worried man, now
to sing a worried song
Last
February, our buddy Mike Napodano invited all of his friends over
to his home for his annual Italian Day festival. It's an all-day
event featuring good food, good friends, and the greatness of The
Godfather Parts I and II. (We will not discuss Godfather
III, as the mere mention of Sofia Coppola induces shudders down
my spine matched only by the sight of Sting singing "Every Breath
You Take" with Christina Aguilera and the Backstreet Boys)On this day, however, it wasn't Jay's pizza or Simon's risotto
or Dino's sausage and peppers that wowed me-it was the sight of
our friend John Dietrich tickling the ivories in a most impressive
fashion. I have to admit, I've known the man for years but had no
idea he could play. I knew he could design kick-ass websites and
annoy the hell out of Simon on a regular basis, but who knew he
could play the piano?
So
when John told me had impulsively purchased a Neil Diamond songbook
on-line and wanted to get together and play, I said sure. After
all, I love to sing the Neil any time-and it's not like Diamondbag
ever actually practices or anything. So on Saturday June 7th,
Johnny appeared on my doorstep with his keyboard and new Neil Diamond
songbook. We learned two songs that day-the oft-requested "Hello
Again," and the beautiful "September Morn." They sounded pretty
good, too, although lemme tell ya that "Hello Again" is a bitch
to sing. Listen to Neil try to do it live, and you'll hear what
I'm talking about.
We
had such a good time that I told John that we'd try to sneak one
of the tunes in at our next LBG show if the rest of the band was
OK with it. Over the next month, John kept asking me, "Are we gonna
play it? Are we gonna play it?"
The
day before the gig, John tells me we can't do it.
"I'll
forget it. I'll get up there and lose my place and it will suck."
Since
that basically describes half of the songs we play anyways, I told
him he had nothing to fear. So on the afternoon of July 5th,
we reconvened at my place to run over the songs again and pick the
best one to play. It became clear that "September Morn" was our
choice, although "Hello Again" was starting to sound pretty good
too. After what seemed like 30 run-throughs, we decided we knew
it and that it was time to unleash the majesty of "September Morn"
on an unsuspecting (not to mention drunk and vulnerable) public.
So
after the second set got off to a scorching start with "America,"
"Forever In Blue Jeans," and "Holly Holy," it was time for John
to make his stage debut. I introduced him as the honorary sixth
member of Diamondbag, but of course also gave props to the other
two honorary 6th members: Mike Teschner and Matt Bentle.
I could tell that John was pretty much terrified all night, but
it also seemed that the seven Sapphire and tonics had calmed his
nerves a bit as well.
We
went into the song, and the crowd roared. I thought they were cheering
the beauty of one of Neil's most heartfelt ballads, but then I realized
they were cheering for Jon & Simon, who had decided to slow-dance
together on the side of the stage. The fact that I even remembered
the words after that sight was my one true accomplishment of the
evening! Everyone was holding their lighters in the air, and for
four brief minutes the room was filled with love and enchantment.
John left the stage to a rousing and well-deserved ovation (dude
you rocked!), and then I begged the band to come back on stage.
I have to ask these things nicely, you know, because one day they
just may tell me to fuck off. But happily they did indeed decide
to come back up and spare the audience from my a capella
rendering of the Judas Priest classic "Livin' After Mignight."
Part
V: What's the World Coming To?
What's
the world coming to?
What's the world coming to?
Everyone's gone to the moon
What's the world coming to?
Do
you remember that commercial from the late '80s/early '90s where
the hippie says, "Hey, is that Freedom Rock? Well turn it up man!!!"Well, it's a given that at every rock show, be it at Trees
or Madison Square Garden, someone-probably that same hippie-will
scream out for "Freebird."
Of
course, most bands are wise enough to simply ignore such a ridiculous
request. But not Diamondbag.
Okay,
I admit it: we played it. We didn't know it, but since when has
that stopped us? I will say that Jon played a ripping solo at the
end, and that the crowd seemed to love the silliness. Later in the
evening, No Commitment also joined in the madness with another impromptu
Skynyrd classic: "Sweet Home Alabama." I hid in the bathroom.
We
may never live this down. What IS the world coming to?
Part VI: That's
All For Everyone
I
need somewhere to go
That's all
Must be what I need
That's all
I need someone to know
Last call
Exactly what I need
After
Diamondbag ended its second set with the obligatory second helping
of "Sweet Caroline," I knew my work for the night was done. Even
if No Commitment had asked me to sing a song during their evening-ending
set, it simply wasn't going to happen-my voice was shot. Speaking
of shots, there were a few with my name on them.
When
Simon joined the guys on stage for the evening's final song-"The
Real Me"-I was tempted to jump up and take over. But then I remembered
the God-awful note I hit during the last "Sweet Caroline," and my
ass was right back in my chair. By the way, I don't know how Simon
can rock out so hard on the bass after 14 double Jack-and-Cokes-he
is truly amazing.
When
they finally kicked us out of the LBG about 2:30, we all headed
for the traditional after-party at "The House." Jay passed out quickly,
Jon soon followed, and Simon probably wishes he had passed out.
I, on the other hand, was wide awake. I finally managed to make
my way through the throng of lifeless bodies covering the floor
and got home about 6 a.m.. It had been a long day, but the show
was a good one and it seemed like everybody had a great time. It
had been a very trying few days for me, and I want to thank all
of my good friends for your support. I love you guys.
As
always, thanks to all of you who consistently come to our shows
and for making this band so much fun. And of course, I'd like to
thank Jon & Jay & Mike & Eric. I don't do that nearly
enough, and I should because these guys really smoke. I hope everyone
had a safe and Happy Fourth, and we'll see you again when Diamondbag
invades Club Dada on Friday, August 15.Rumor has it that we're recording this one, so you may see
our own little version of Hot August Night on the market
in the near future. Frightening, isn't it?
And
I wish you all the love in the world,
But most of all, I wish it from myself.
Set One
Girl You'll Be a Woman Soon
Kentucky Woman
Cracklin' Rosie
Cherry Cherry
I'm a Believer
Rock Me Gently
Sweet Caroline>
Set Two
America
Forever In Blue Jeans
Shilo
Walk On Water
Holly Holy
September Morn
Freebird
Creep
Love On the Rocks
Heartlight
Brother Love's Traveling
Salvation Show
Sweet Caroline
